Becoming ME

It has become painfully obvious to me that I hold on to pain and allow it to eat me up inside. Things from my childhood haunt me and occurrences from recent years still burn a hole in my thoughts.

I don't think that it's necessarily a bad thing that I feel so much. But, when you put other people ahead of yourself and allow everything in, it has a lasting effect.

I was always an emotional child; the one to give hugs and cry when an animal passed way. That is not something I can really change. After much soul-searching and prayer, I have come up with a theory.

God has a plan for each of us and lessons he wishes us to learn. In the end, it is the most important aspect of your life. I believe that my Heavenly Father intends for me to live a life of feelings and empathy. At times, that may mean that I go through a painful emotion, but one should be willing to take the bad with the good.

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent" - Eleanor Roosevelt said it best.

I have to stop living my life based on what others may think or feel about my choices. I do what I think is right, and I don't think that I am a mean person who sets out to hurt others. In trying to live like others and be strong, I have lost myself.

In coming back to 'me', I am embracing my emotions and pain, and allowing myself to feel again; to work through my thoughts and apologize to no one for it.

I don't want to be an angry person, and I believe that my Father in heaven is trying to help me get back to my path. "Life's a journey, not a destination...But, how far can you fly with broken wings?" The answer is, as high as your imagination and faith will take you....